Today my husband and I received letters from a church we attended almost 10 years ago regarding whether we wanted to discontinue membership. I found it funny at first, considering we have been at FBC for nine years and the last time we attended NCBC we only had one child, a toddler who is now almost a teenager.
It was also touching. I have often felt FBC to be a large extended family of 300. I feel closer to and more comfortable with people there than I do to some by whom I am related by blood. I didn't neccearily feel that way at NCBC, but that is only because I did not allow myself to. It could be that some there felt that way about me, however.
The letter from NCBC showed me that believers in Christ will always be family, regardless of where life's path takes us. And, when all is said and done, we will be rejoicing in one big family reunion in the precense of our Savior.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Sunday, July 6, 2008
The Journey is Here
but my heart is there. There is a song by a Christian artist that sings these exact lyrics. Originally, I thought it was morbid. Was he singing about wanting to die? Now I understand what he is saying and feel the same way.
I am not ready to die anytime soon, but becoming a Christian has allowed me to face the prospect with peace and not terror. Back in the day, I used to wake up with full-blown panic attacks over fear of dying. Panic gave way to peace, however, when I had assurance of what lie ahead. As our pastor said in today's sermon, the best is yet to come.
This life can be a terrible struggle, and it is a challenge for me not to dwell on that in these stressful economic times. Yet, when I trust God with the details of my own life and try to be a blessing to others, He again gives me peace. We are not here for ourselves.
I am not ready to die anytime soon, but becoming a Christian has allowed me to face the prospect with peace and not terror. Back in the day, I used to wake up with full-blown panic attacks over fear of dying. Panic gave way to peace, however, when I had assurance of what lie ahead. As our pastor said in today's sermon, the best is yet to come.
This life can be a terrible struggle, and it is a challenge for me not to dwell on that in these stressful economic times. Yet, when I trust God with the details of my own life and try to be a blessing to others, He again gives me peace. We are not here for ourselves.
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Humbled
I have been at our wonderful church for nine years now. It has only been in the past three that I have gotten over myself, ie, waiting for everyone to come to me, and reached out to make friends with other women. It has been a journey that satisfies me to the soul. Sometimes I can not believe I am the same person, and truthfully, I'm not. Once I fully surrendered to Christ, He has been stretching me in ways I could not have dreamed of when doing it my way. That is why I love 2 Corinthians 5:17. It describes me perfectly.
I am humbled because several of these new friends (and even some old ones) have taken the time to tell me what I mean to them. I have gotten hugs two days in a row! I was completely taken off guard. They love me? They're proud of me? Are they sure they have the right Lisa?
I give all the glory to God. I tried and failed at life enough to know that the person I have become and am becoming is simply the manifestation of the Holy Spirit at work in my life. Why didn't I let Him in earlier? I guess to make a more interesting testimony. It shows that God does not give up on anyone, and can indeed make beauty from ashes.
I am humbled because several of these new friends (and even some old ones) have taken the time to tell me what I mean to them. I have gotten hugs two days in a row! I was completely taken off guard. They love me? They're proud of me? Are they sure they have the right Lisa?
I give all the glory to God. I tried and failed at life enough to know that the person I have become and am becoming is simply the manifestation of the Holy Spirit at work in my life. Why didn't I let Him in earlier? I guess to make a more interesting testimony. It shows that God does not give up on anyone, and can indeed make beauty from ashes.
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Paycheck From God?
I have been unemployed or underemployed for one full year now. I have been rejected so many times in the past 12 months that I could begin to take it personally. Most interviews or applications have been for office work and have all ended without getting a job. This used to be so easy. Then I turned 40.
God is so patient. What has taken me a year to figure out is maybe He doesn't want me sitting behind a desk anymore. He has gifted me in other areas like writing, compassion for people and activism. I have largely ignored these gifts because to act on them involves risk. What if I'm no good? What if I work with people and someone gets hurt? I'm shy (or used to be) - what if I stammer over my words, turn beet red and in general make a fool of myself? Better to sit at a computer all day and have contact with no one. Oh, me of little faith!
The past several weeks have brought several opportunities to get out of my comfort zone. I say these things not to show how wonderful I am, but how wonderful God is. I have taught at Vacation Bible School, driven a prisoner's child to our church camp, delivered meals to the elderly and disabled, provided transportation to an elderly member of our church and have publicly shared my weight-loss journey to lose more than 100 pounds, brought about only by God's grace.
I have also had the opportunity to work one on one with my very special 5-year-old nephew. In five short years, he has overcome and continues to deal with more health problems that most people would face in a 100-year lifespan. He's a bundle of energy who needs constant supervision and has a very limited vocabulary, though in the past few months, he has really started to imitate words. Working with him has been exhausting in a way that a day at the office never was, but immeasurably more rewarding.
I may finally be getting the message. When I look at job postings for the same old same old, I am filled with resignation that it is what I have always done and all I can do in the future. When I look at social service job postings, my heart is filled with joy and I think "I can do that." I no longer feel the fear that has held me back all of my adult life. I have faith that if God is leading me in a certain direction, and I am sure that He is, He will give me the courage and confidence to do the job. "He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it."
I see the wisdom now in my $8 checking account balance and this long period of drought. Like many areas of my life, it is only when it reaches a near crisis and I am in panic mode that I stop relying only on myself and turn it over to God. Though I have proven to myself over and over that I do a thoroughly good job in messing things up of my own accord, I still keep trying.
I know the right job will be here soon and it will be one that not only provides for my family's needs, but one that serves others and uses my gifts. In other words, it will be the job God has intended for me all along.
God is so patient. What has taken me a year to figure out is maybe He doesn't want me sitting behind a desk anymore. He has gifted me in other areas like writing, compassion for people and activism. I have largely ignored these gifts because to act on them involves risk. What if I'm no good? What if I work with people and someone gets hurt? I'm shy (or used to be) - what if I stammer over my words, turn beet red and in general make a fool of myself? Better to sit at a computer all day and have contact with no one. Oh, me of little faith!
The past several weeks have brought several opportunities to get out of my comfort zone. I say these things not to show how wonderful I am, but how wonderful God is. I have taught at Vacation Bible School, driven a prisoner's child to our church camp, delivered meals to the elderly and disabled, provided transportation to an elderly member of our church and have publicly shared my weight-loss journey to lose more than 100 pounds, brought about only by God's grace.
I have also had the opportunity to work one on one with my very special 5-year-old nephew. In five short years, he has overcome and continues to deal with more health problems that most people would face in a 100-year lifespan. He's a bundle of energy who needs constant supervision and has a very limited vocabulary, though in the past few months, he has really started to imitate words. Working with him has been exhausting in a way that a day at the office never was, but immeasurably more rewarding.
I may finally be getting the message. When I look at job postings for the same old same old, I am filled with resignation that it is what I have always done and all I can do in the future. When I look at social service job postings, my heart is filled with joy and I think "I can do that." I no longer feel the fear that has held me back all of my adult life. I have faith that if God is leading me in a certain direction, and I am sure that He is, He will give me the courage and confidence to do the job. "He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it."
I see the wisdom now in my $8 checking account balance and this long period of drought. Like many areas of my life, it is only when it reaches a near crisis and I am in panic mode that I stop relying only on myself and turn it over to God. Though I have proven to myself over and over that I do a thoroughly good job in messing things up of my own accord, I still keep trying.
I know the right job will be here soon and it will be one that not only provides for my family's needs, but one that serves others and uses my gifts. In other words, it will be the job God has intended for me all along.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)